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This is an absolute delight. Bright and fun and funny (sooo funny) and snarky and hip and delicious. To say nothing of being exceptionally well written (I'm a dork, that sort of thing matters to me) and having some of the best dialog ever. I'm still smiling, and I think I will be every time I come back and read it again.
Also? Scallops are the food of the Gods. I'm just sayin'.